2023
Help, someone pooped my pants
Yeah I ain't got shit to lead off with. Tried to scrape some proverbial shit off my shoe and see if I could get 700-900 words from that, but to no avail. That, it's the second half of our sprint, and I'm busier
regular season
2023
How you like them apples?
I played a little hookie from work and went apple picking last Friday. And let me tell you: I know a thing or two about apples and apple picking. Shit, I'd consider the region I grew up in as the land of Apple Orchards. With the the birthplace
2023
Hello, I’m Commander Biden. Bite to meet you
New Hampshah So what'd y'all do last Sunday? You all watch some football? Maybe dabble in a little bit of New Generation New England Futility? Perhaps renewing your membership into the fellowship of the miserable? The day “The Fellowship of The Miserable” was born…It was
2023
Postin like an avalanche comin down the mountain
Tim Wakefield The Man I know not everyone is a Red Sox fan. I'm sure plenty of you out there actually kinda sorta hate the Red Sox as an organization and team. Understandable. A lot of us die-hard fans hated them too. Shit, Tom Yawkee was a
2023
Busier than a cat at a laser show
Preamble It's come to my attention that people have found some discrepancies in a number of comments I've made in my past. Specifically, my rather mild opinion of, "fuck cheese." Many of you may have called into question the integrity of my entire column
2023
Battle of the Rotary Fast Foods
As per usual, if you ain't interested in whatever dipshit content I happen to have vomit this week, just scroll on down to the NFL Recapulations! Growing up, there was a rotary dubbed, the Ayer Rotary. Well, it goes by a more official name as well: Frederick Carlton
2023
It's easier not to be great
Fuck you, Thor Let me paint the weekend picture for you: It's mid-Friday afternoon, I'm trying to wrap up a bunch of dependency updates while yelling at my computer because fuck you, the tests worked before the update so WHY DON'T THEY KNOW,
2022
Aaaaand USA Lost
Followed by Poland. Stupid fuckin sport. Late Let's say, hypothetically, that you were, for instance, using my keyboard. Now keep up. Let's say that you, yes you, wanted to type up one of these columns. Hypothetically, of course. Now that we have established that you want
2022
It's not rocket appliances
Gobble Gobble Hey everyone! Hope y'all enjoyed the week and had a mother fuckin awesome Thanksgiving week! Despite the result of the Greatriots game, it was still such a fucking great day of football - one that I barely fucking caught because I was playing the god. Damn. HOST.
2022
Proper Preparation Prevents Piss-Poor Performance
That other football I guess it's getting underway. Oh hell yeah, I'm super excited to continue feeding a monstrously evil capitalist grift of galactic proportions. Wait what is that? They just banned cheering with both hands while in stadiums? OK, as long as I can celebrate
power rankings
Title for the Week 10 Power Rankings during Week 11
Yeah yeah yeah, I know I just fucking emailed all of you earlier this week. It's just that skipping out on two straight weeks of power rankings left me in a state of near giving a shit. So with this building guilt, I set upon sculpting my content.
recap
Say Pizza to Drugs
In College I Studied Abroad or Two Big fan of that NFL Europe thing. I loved the Amsterdam Admirals, perfect team to play against so I could earn the maximum amount of Madden Cards as I could. But I guess Germany has better singers or some shit, This is UNBELIEVABLE.